Junior, you can do one too!

Apologies for the delay in updating you all.  ‎Things have been quite hectic of late. The mantra that domestic chores are never done is ringing true coupled with having to try my hand at being a florist.  I am not a natural!

As some of you know, on Wednesday 2nd December Sammy had to‎ put that well practised game face on and go for her second craniotomy in as many weeks to dispatch Junior! The fact that she walked herself into the anaesthetist’s layer is something of a marvel!  Sammy’s determination and the bravery she is displaying is a lesson to us all!  It is awe-inspiring, humbling and makes me/us immensely proud.

Into surgery she went and five hours later our wonderful surgeon James, called to say the operation went as well as it could have gone and that we could go and see her in intensive care.  Sayonara Junior!   Again she had a substantial bandage and a million wires coming out of her but she recognised me/us!  Not only that but also her speech seemed intact (a bit slurry, but no worse than me after 3 pints and unsurprising given another monster drugs binge…).  As for her memory, it is as ever, à point.  When I saw James shortly after the op, the restraining order went out the window, this time I did hug him and again swiftly burst into floods of tears! I can’t quite put into words the sense of relief that we all felt.

It is incredibly sobering to think that when we first went into A&E on that fateful day, we were told that unless they operated on Terry then Sammy might not see Christmas!  James and his amazing team at the Atkinson Morley Ward have smashed Terry and now Junior.  Jemma gave Sammy a hilarious but appropriate star for our Christmas tree.  James you are the star on our tree. 

Sammy had to spend the night in intensive care again to be kept under constant supervision given the nature of the operation.  Again, I cannot reiterate the care and attention she received.  As I have said before, nobody wants to spend time in intensive care but it is incredibly reassuring to know that when one does visit as a “client”, the care you receive is different class!  What shocked and angered me however is that the chefs get paid more than these nurses!  It is as appalling as is the food… 

That night the nurse sweetly allowed me to leave Sammy her mobile and the following morning, Sammy sent me a text and it went like this:

“I am doing something you can’t”

“What’s that?” I replied

“Taking a pee in bed”… 

Her sense of humour was evidently still firing on all cylinders.  I am sure she will kill me for sharing this but I think it is humour, love, courage and sheer bloody-mindedness which get people through this ghastly illness that affects so many of us.  Sammy has all of these attributes in spades and all your support validate these reasons to fight.  YOU ALL ROCK!  This is not to say that she will not have dark days but this is when you come in again and again and again.  Your continued support makes me well up, because when we need you, you have been there and I cannot begin to thank you enough! 

Junior, despite being half as big as Terry, was in a much more palpable location physically.  The operation required a barnet chop that may be deemed “cool” in the East End by some “trendoi” but generally it isn’t a look a girl would typically go for... “A short front please Nicky Clark…”  They had to shave the front of her hair so that they could make the incision in her hairline.  The scar is impressive.  It runs from her left ear along the hairline and down to her right hand temple.  It is extremely neat, 12 out of 10 again James.  I am adamant that once the hair grows back it will not be visible in the slightest. 

I think Sammy found looking in the mirror for the first time tough.  The scar, the stiches, the swelling and two black eyes is tough for anyone but especially when you have gone through everything she has mentally already to then see it physically is another blow.  However, she took it in her stride and the hair is growing back, the stitches and the swelling are gone and Sammy radiates beauty from the outside as she does from the inside yet again.

Due to the fact that she had two extremely traumatic surgeries in such close proximity it was hardly surprising that this one took the wind out of her sails and the recovery has been a tiny bit slower.  Yet, she has recovered much quicker than anyone would have expected. She continues to stun the surgeon and nurses and this is down to her can do attitude.  On the Sunday after the operation when I arrived at hospital I found her sitting on the end of her bed looking out the window.  She had dressed herself and packed her bag and it is an image I will never, ever forget.  Because on the Friday I had pretty much had to carry her to the bathroom.  She looked at me and said “I need to go home”.  There was no way I could have said no, despite her having had some morphine for the pain only hours earlier she was determined to be home and it was the right thing to do.

Sammy continues to get stronger each day and she is still in need of her afternoon naps but she is busy being festive and doing as much as she can to have fun and look for the best in everything.  She has decorated the tree and we are ready for our first Christmas in our own house together.  We are going to have a wonderful Christmas and make the most of it until we have to face the music again in January.

The bad news is that it has been confirmed that it looks highly likely that it is Terry’s ghastly henchmen that are in the liver.  Although it was always a possibility, it is yet another piece of torrid news to add to the long list from the last few weeks.  So, the next steps are to rest up until January.  They will then use radiosurgery to zap the tumour beds in the brain.  This is not surgery but a very intense laser which is the belt and braces to the surgery.  We then meet with the oncologist Professor Dalgleish on the 6th January who will give the prognosis and the next steps and treatment that Sammy will have to undertake.  The great news is he happens to be a leading expert (widely acclaimed) in Melanoma and a pioneer in immunology.  Incidentally he is also based at St Georges and Parkside.  So we have yet another master of the profession in our team and if Jimmy Carter can beat Melanoma aged 90 then we must stand a fighting chance because Sammy is fit, strong, determined and is really due a break!  Not only that but she has a mass of support from all corners of the globe.  It is truly humbling how many people are wishing her well and praying for her and that is because she is incredibly special. 

It is on this note that Sammy’s sister Alice secretly started a campaign to get some “others” to send her a message.  The response has been phenomenal from those that have never met Sammy but have heard her plight.  Not all the messages have been uploaded yet but a showcase are housed under messages.  Thank you a million to those who have taken so much time and effort to send their wishes and love because it puts a stride in her step and it is amazing how kind people can be.  Please do pass this blog on to anyone you think may also want to contribute as her fight is going to go on and on.

Again our families have been outstanding and we are both incredibly grateful to you. Our friends continue to be truly phenomenal and Sammy’s office never fails to keep surprising us with their outstanding support.  Thank you again to all of those who have wished Sammy well who haven’t met her and a particular thanks to Harry Collins for setting up this blog!

Wishing you all a very, very happy Christmas with all out love.

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